I didn’t want our 3-year Joaquin to ice skate yet. My husband, Paolo, offered to skate with him but I wasn’t sure about the idea. I could think of 101 ways how he could get hurt on the ice. But Joaquin was so persistent, not wanting to miss out on the fun with his siblings. So I let him.

As they headed inside, I called Paolo on his cellphone to give him reminders and he told me “Jenn, it’s ok. I have done this with our 3 other kids before” and hung up. He was right.

In the first thirty minutes or so, Joaquin just clung on to Paolo’s legs and just allowed himself to drag wherever his dad went. But I also saw how, with Paolo’s prodding, he gradually gained confidence to let go and take a few strides all on his own. I wish I could describe the happiness on Joaquin’s face!

This brought back pictures in my mind of Paolo doing exactly the same thing with each of our three older kids several years back and he did know what to do.

Often times I am overcome by worry, afraid to relinquish control to my husband. I fear that he will not be able to do as good a job as I expect him to. But time and time again, I am proven wrong.

If there is one thing I have realized over the years it’s that my husband is good at so many things I am not good at. But I need to step out of the way and let him do his job.


  • owie

    Hi Ms Jen! I can totally relate. Just the other day I had to stop myself from getting our 2 month old baby girl from her dad when she was starting to cry. I had to remind myself that her dad can calm her down too. Such a timely blog! thanks!

  • Varsha

    I love reading your blogs, Ate Jenn, and seeing what you’re learning along the way. Thanks for sharing! 🙂 GOOD JOB AS ALWAYS, KUYA PAO!

    • Yane PeBenito

      “My husband is good at so many things I’m not good at.”

      Awww! This truth put a lump in my throat! Thank you for sharing, Ms. Jen! I can so relate to other lines: “afraid to relinquish control to husband” coz he might not be able to “do as good a job as I expect him to.” And so we try to do it all, and exhaust ourselves doing so. Yun pala, they can naman. 🙂

      God is good! His design for marriage- and parenting & family life- is perfect!

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