Just when things at home are peacful and you believe that all your training and discipline are paying off, one of your children commits an offense that catches you off guard and then you feel that you’re back to square one.
Can you relate with me? Out of the blue, when you least expect it, that child does something that makes you question all your parenting efforts and ask yourself if he even understood a thing you’ve been teaching him all these years.
A time like this is challenging but it’s also a good time to be reminded of some important things:
1. Our children need a Savior. Their tendency will always be towards sin unless they surrender their lives to Jesus. And even so, they will never be perfect. They are, like us, in a lifetime process of change and transformation. They will fall and make mistakes, that’s for sure, and my hope is that when they do, they will always have the humility to confess their sin and repent from it.
2. God loves our children. God has a plan for them and desires for them to live in His will so they can enjoy His blessings. And when a child is out of bounds, it is God who gives us the ability to discern it. He exposes things that we need to know so we can help our child go back to the right path. And when our children are found out, we need to remind them that it is God’s love that exposed their sin. The longer they are in sin, the more they will miss out on God’s blessings. Parenting with God as our partner makes our job so much easier.
3. I need God. I cannot parent without Him, without His grace working in my heart and my children’s lives. Psalm 127:1 says “Unless the LORD builds the house, the builders labor in vain.” It is not the number of parenting books I have read, or the number of parenting seminars I have attended, though those are very helpful, that make me effective as a parent, but ultimately, it is the power of God that is at work in my children’s hearts that fuels the change in their lives. I need to continually declare my dependence on God as I raise my children. It is He who will build my house.
Often I feel like the boy who had only two loaves of bread and five fish. How can this be enough to feed 5,000? But when Jesus blessed what he had to give, it miraculously multiplied and there was even leftover. Whenever a child of mine does something wrong, I am once more confronted by my inadequacies as a mom. Will what I do ever be enough for my kids? But then again, it’s not about me and what I can do, is it? As God blesses my efforts, I trust it will bear fruit in my kids’ lives.
It’s all about God and what He can do. Everyday, I have to entrust my children to Him.