discipline is more than punishment

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I got this note from my daughter yesterday after we had a “little” confrontation. After I read it, I told her I forgive her and gave her a hug. After a time of discipline, it is our joy to see our kids repent and ask for forgiveness for the wrong that they have done. Discipline is more than punishment or giving consequences. If after you have grounded your child, or given him a spanking, and yet he remains hard-hearted, and there is no change in him, then it just means you are not done with discipline yet. What we want to see happen is for our kids to acknowledge what they have done and repent from it. We want a change of heart which restores them back to a right relationship with us and with God.

discipline is more than punishment

Posted on 1 CommentPosted in Parenting

I got this note from my daughter yesterday after we had a “little” confrontation. After I read it, I told her I forgive her and gave her a hug. After a time of discipline, it is our joy to see our kids repent and ask for forgiveness for the wrong that they have done. Discipline is more than punishment or giving consequences. If after you have grounded your child, or given him a spanking, and yet he remains hard-hearted, and there is no change in him, then it just means you are not done with discipline yet. What we want to see happen is for our kids to acknowledge what they have done and repent from it. We want a change of heart which restores them back to a right relationship with us and with God.

on whining

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All of my kids go through periods of whining. From my 1 yr old to my 14 yr old. Kids whine for different reasons but mostly it’s when things don’t go their way. It’s when they want to buy that lollipop in the supermarket, or to stay up late or go out with their friends and you say no, then they endlessly nag you in that high-pitched, grumbling, complaining tone. Whining really irritates me. (Occasionally though, my kids would be whining, only for me to realize that I have been too busy with other stuff and haven’t been giving them the attention they need. In times like these, I do my best to re-organize my week to make sure I spend ample time with them.) Though it is very common in kids, they have to be taught how to communicate properly even when they are emotional. And they just have […]

why our kids misbehave (part 2)

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If you haven’t read part 1, click here. The 2nd point I wanted to comment on from the video presentation was this: Punishment and rewards are the biggest time-wasters and the least effective ways to get any child to really listen and respect you. On the contrary, I think it is very dangerous not to let our kids experience the consequences of their actions because it is not like that in the real world. Again, there are many new parenting methods that come out every year, and in the 14 years of parenting experience I’ve had, I still see that the old, time and tested ways of the Bible is what works the best. Eph 6: 1-3 says “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “that it may go well with you and that […]

why our kids misbehave

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Another message from facebook: hi ms. jenn, i just stumbled upon this video link and i thought of sharing with you and want to know your thoughts. questionable though http://happychildguide.com/presentation/v1/how-to-get-your-child-to-listen_1/   I clicked on the link and watched the video presentation for about 15 minutes and decided i didn’t want to buy the book they were selling. There are a lot of new books out there on parenting and it is quite tricky to choose what to read and apply. I always use one filter to choose which books to read : the Word of God. For this particular book, though I didn’t read the whole material, there were 2 points the author raised from the 15-min presentation that to me are questionable: ( I will discuss the other point on my next blog) 1. The real reason why kids misbehave is found in the child’s brain chemistry. When a […]

setting boundaries for our kids

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Today our little Joaquin got hold of a marker and started drawing on a small white board. After a few minutes, to my shock, I realized that his marker started to wander off the board and onto our floor. Had I not caught him in time, I’m sure his marker would have made it to our walls, and bedsheets, and clothes. I wonder how our house would look like if Paolo and I didn’t have boundaries for our kids. According to my daughter Janina, this place would look like a “dumpster.” Empty bags of chips all over, dirty clothes in the hallway, wet cotton balls stuck on the mirror (yes they’ve done this), drawings on the walls, CD’s on the floor, kids screaming at each other and possibly hurting each other, etc, etc. You get the idea. Why the need for boundaries? Boundaries keep our children safe and secure. Just […]

i’m making God sad

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I had to discipline Ryan because he disobeyed an instruction. In an attempt to explain to a 2 year old that obeying is about pleasing God, I said “If we obey, God is happy. But if we disobey, God is sad.” To this Ryan replied, “You’re making God sad because you are making me cry.”