do we pass the test?

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Yesterday, some of you might have read on my Facebook status that I have written “So many things went wrong today, but still, God is good.” Top of the list was Ryan accidentally spilled water on their laptop. We immediately brought it to a Powermac service center, and found out that to have everything repaired will cost us more than P60,000! How ridiculous is that! But that’s not my point today 😉 Things like these will test our character, our values and our priorities. Here is my husband’s insightful blog about the whole incident.

discipline is more than punishment

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I got this note from my daughter yesterday after we had a “little” confrontation. After I read it, I told her I forgive her and gave her a hug. After a time of discipline, it is our joy to see our kids repent and ask for forgiveness for the wrong that they have done. Discipline is more than punishment or giving consequences. If after you have grounded your child, or given him a spanking, and yet he remains hard-hearted, and there is no change in him, then it just means you are not done with discipline yet. What we want to see happen is for our kids to acknowledge what they have done and repent from it. We want a change of heart which restores them back to a right relationship with us and with God.

discipline is more than punishment

Posted on 1 CommentPosted in Parenting

I got this note from my daughter yesterday after we had a “little” confrontation. After I read it, I told her I forgive her and gave her a hug. After a time of discipline, it is our joy to see our kids repent and ask for forgiveness for the wrong that they have done. Discipline is more than punishment or giving consequences. If after you have grounded your child, or given him a spanking, and yet he remains hard-hearted, and there is no change in him, then it just means you are not done with discipline yet. What we want to see happen is for our kids to acknowledge what they have done and repent from it. We want a change of heart which restores them back to a right relationship with us and with God.

be deliberate

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Deuteronomy 6: 6-9 Write these commandments that I’ve given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and then get them inside your children. Talk about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminder; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates. God wants us to deliberately and aggressively teach our children His commandments. He wants us, the parents, to do it, not the school, not the media, not the church. He wants us to do it wherever we are, whatever time of day. That means while eating breakfast, we prepare them for school with the word of God. Or while driving along the road, and we see an […]

my favorite child

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Once in a while, somebody asks me “Who is your favorite among your 4 children?” And why not? Everybody has a favorite drink, favorite movie, favorite brand. So why, not a favorite child? Maybe the most obedient, or the most good-looking, or the smartest, or the most affectionate one? I have seen how favoritism can tear a family apart. Probably not physically, but emotionally, yes. Favoritism for one child results in rejection for another. Favoritism passes on wrong mindsets to the children. It teaches the favored child that he can have everything he wants and that he can get away with anything he does, whether it’s right or wrong. It teaches the un-favored one that he is not good enough, that he needs to be a certain way, needs to accomplish certain things before he gets accepted. It destroys the relationship among siblings. It causes rivalry and alienation that can […]

window of time

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I read this verse this morning and it reminded me that life is short. Psalm 90: 12 Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom. Our time with our children is limited. Our baby Joaquin is still very dependent on us but it is only a matter of time that he will feed and dress himself. I like it that our 11-year old daughter still consults me on what shoes she should wear with the shirt she’s wearing, but our 14-year old almost never asks for my help. Our 6-year old is at that stage when he is realizing that dad and mom are not perfect and that not they are not always right. I remember when they were much younger and they took everything we told them as the absolutes, when “because mommy said so” was enough to end an argument. The […]

life skills: giving

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My husband likes to read financial books and websites. He likes consulting with financial gurus. In our home, he’s the one who handles the budget, because he’s simply better at it. Year after year, we have made adjustments in our budgeting and I believe we are better at it now compared to when we first started. We have learned a lot about saving, investing and living below our means from all the financial advice we’ve heard. But there is one principle that we’ve both learned from our parents that is not normally mentioned in “How to Get Rich” articles. It is found in Proverbs 11:24 One man gives freely, yet gains even more; another withholds unduly, but comes to poverty. We want to raise our children to be generous. We want them to give freely when there is a need, or even when there is none, but just so they […]

why our kids misbehave (part 2)

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If you haven’t read part 1, click here. The 2nd point I wanted to comment on from the video presentation was this: Punishment and rewards are the biggest time-wasters and the least effective ways to get any child to really listen and respect you. On the contrary, I think it is very dangerous not to let our kids experience the consequences of their actions because it is not like that in the real world. Again, there are many new parenting methods that come out every year, and in the 14 years of parenting experience I’ve had, I still see that the old, time and tested ways of the Bible is what works the best. Eph 6: 1-3 says “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— “that it may go well with you and that […]

accepting autism

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I had a lengthy talk today with a mom who had a child diagnosed with autism. I was so amazed at how this friend of mine talked so openly about her son’s condition, with neither shame nor anger. Her son was diagnosed with autism before he turned 2. Since then, it’s been a life of research, attending conferences and therapies for her son. After 6 years, her son has shown a lot of improvement and is very functional. I asked her what single, most important advice would she give to other parents who are going through the same thing. She said it in one word: Acceptance. Unless a parent accepts that her child has autism, he really will not take the necessary steps to deal with it. And with autism, the earlier you intervene, the higher chances for improvement. That is why acceptance is key. According to her, it is […]

guarding your eyes

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We were at a convenience store the other day with the kids. While I was getting the stuff I needed, I noticed Ryan standing by the magazine rack and he looked like he was shuffling and rearranging the magazines that were neatly stacked in rows. I gave him that glaring “what-are-you-doing!-leave-those-stuff-alone” look while walking quickly to where he was. As I was getting closer, I realized what he was doing. He was turning the magazines the other way, but not all the magazines, only those that had skimpily-clad women on the cover. He told me “It is not good for people to see these.” I felt so proud of my little boy. At 6 years old, he understood what it meant to “guard your eyes.” One of the biggest challenges we parents face these days is how to protect our kids from images that can mar their innocence and purity. […]